The Youth Study Center/My First Prison® .

The Youth Study Center is Philadelphia's detention center for young people. Within the Center, delinquent juveniles are provided with medical, mental health and other social services. Although most of the youth have traditionally remained in the center for less than 20 days this will no longer be true with the privatization and rebranding of the Center as a franchise in the for-profit My First Prison® chain, a division of Poorhauser Inc.

With privatization and the profit imperative come innovation.
It is often said that children are our greatest resource, and that they are our future. Well the future looks bright for shareholders and franchise owners in the My First Prison® chain, with both our stock values and the youth imprisonment rate steadily rising. Our business model takes advantage of the explosive growth of the prison industry in the USA - when it comes to prisoners, We're Number One! While our kids tend to be low-or-unskilled we do have the competitive advantage of the extremely reasonable wages paid to prison laborers in Pennsylvania - starting at 19 cents an hour. In addition to the government per-diem that Poorhauser will receive for each inmate we are constantly innovating new income streams by finding novel (and profitable!) educational opportunities for our Human Capital; the young inmates:

enlarge image>>	The ArtJail Plantation and the New Plantation Cafe: Ah; the Great Outdoors! Kids can't get too much sunshine and fresh air, and our kids get plenty of both working the fields of our lush rooftop plantation. Working in striped uniforms and chain-gang style gives the kids a real old-time look that patrons of The New Plantation Cafe just love - sit out on one of the climate-controlled verandas and watch them pickin' bugs and harvesting delicious, wholesome food that will soon be served right there in the Cafe! Our local, organic crops are a great favorite with many of the area's finest restaurants. An invisible electronic "fence" protects patrons by delivering an electric shock to any inmate who strays too close to the Cafe
enlarge image>>	ArtJail-related Manufacturing: Licensing of images from the Barnes Collection to the Fine Arts Television Network creates a huge opportunity for our inmates to gain valuable experience in manufacturing, packaging, and order fulfillment. The extraordinarily low cost of prison labor allows us to create new factory jobs right here in Philadelphia; jobs that would ordinarily be off-shored to other countries.
enlarge image>>	My First Prison Abroad®: Imagine a group of underprivileged city kids; kids who don't ordinarily get to travel a whole lot, especially to other countries. Take those kids and give them a free trip to a tropical island, or to a free-trade zone in Africa or Central America, and give them valuable work experience in an exotic culture - it's got to be awesome! The problem: the unsurpassed imprisonment rate in the US has been a bonanza for private companies, but it's also a great and growing burden on tax coffers stretched thin by wars, corruption, and tax cuts. How do we bring down the costs associated with imprisonment while maintaining a profitable business model? We believe that our proposed My First Prison Abroad® program is the solution. How jealous are the kids "back on the block" going to be when they hear that Jimmy or Janey is jetting off to the Mariana Islands for 3-5 years, and that they'll be working for some of the fashionable clothing labels that the kids just can't get enough of - maybe even sewing the actual "threads" that their friends are wearing back in the USA? Group travel rates allow us to keep the amount of money that the kids borrow from us to cover their travel expenses to a bare minimum, and the business-friendly environment of the Free Trade Zone means the kids can work as many overtime hours as they like per week to pay back the money they owe us.

 

Among the many distinctive and memorable features of the ArtJail are the sections of the building that look like giant television sets. The culturescape of the Parkway is enriched by these oversized, working flat-screen TVs, and the flat-screen technology makes most of the space inside the giant TV usable as administrative and dormitory space. The Youth Study Center television will use sophisticated software to scan the cable TV spectrum 24 hours a day, picking out and presenting a discontinuous montage of violent scenes. In the unlikely event that there is a moment when there is no violent imagery on any of the cable stations, there will be a selection of scenes from violent video games available to fill in.